Untamed Heart

“This event is about access not exposition. Look around you Alvs. It's really a world ruled by bloodlines and bank accounts. Don't ever think for a second that being part of this world was your fault.” Paolo said after we finish our glasses.

“Look honey, it's Rica.” My mom told me as I glanced at my ex and her entourage. “I knew you were gonna be here.” Rica told me after giving each other a customary kiss. “How sweet of you to take your mom. Are you with…..?” I didn't let her finish anymore and told her that Ayanna and I have matured in different directions…
As always, paparazzis have to ruin everything. “Alvin, Rica, can we have pictures of you together?”
“Lets talk after the concert.” Rica said after we primped and posed for the photographers.

Later that day, Rica and I went out and we finally decided to leave everything behind, this with the hope of being friends once more in the future….

I wonder how long we must stand amidst the ruins of past relationships. I must admit that I have squatted in the emotional wasteland of a past relationship far longer than the relationship itself. And now that I have nearly gotten used to being in one, it crumbles once more to the ground. I wish I had the answers but I cannot help but look at all the rubble and see nothing but questions. I am tired and I am getting too old for this.

So Ayanna, much as it pains me to say good bye, it is the only way I know which is most fair to either of us. My world is largely the reason for my being who I am. The fact that you cannot accept that simply tells me that while our passion for each other burns bright, our love, sadly, dims in comparison.

So this is the end of what was a short but worthwhile chapter, in my life at least. I thank you for the chance to have known you and our earnest yet now obviously futile attempts at loving each other. It was fleeting, but it was great while it lasted.

Do I wish things had ended differently? Truthfully, no. I wish it hadn't ended at all. Worlds really are nothing more than people's lives, woven inextricably with each other to form a rich tapestry. I had thought we could weave our own world, with colors from your world and mine. We'll never know now would we. It's a pity and I won't deny the fact that it makes me sad. But you have chosen, and I respect that. I'm letting go now. Live well. Love real.

As for myself, I know that today is where my book begins while the rest remains unwritten…

The lights begin to flicker, the sound begins to falter as I dry my tears…